Racing The Station... Greg has a boo boo on his tootsie

Hi race fans, I'm Greg the awesome triathlete and sometimes commentator to the stars. I had another race and I'm here to tell you about it. It was a fun race. The End.

Ok, kidding... So it was a duathlon, which is fun. It consists of a 2 mile run, 14.5 mile bike, and then another 2 mile run. The premiss of this race is that you are racing the International Space Station. The ISS takes 91 minutes and 12 seconds to orbit the Earth. Our mission was to complete the course in under 91 minutes and 12 seconds. If you did, you got prizes, glory, and virgins. By virgins I mean a pin and a poster. But every story is better with virgins.

This race was going to be Melissa's first foray into multi-sport events. This is the last real race of the year so I wanted to do good. But 3 days before the race I had a bike accident that left the big toe on my left foot a bloody mess, and the bones bruised or possibly horribly shattered. Somehow I managed to push through the pain and complete the race, but it was hard. As a sidenote, one skill that is important in all this racing nonsense is the ability to make excuses for your many shortcomings. I'm proud to announce that I excel at this part of it!

Strapping on the timing chip

Going to get a briefing

Our bikes

Locked and Loaded

we done been briefed

She is 65

So the race started, and then we raced. Personally I had a good run on the first leg. I ran a 8:45 mile/min pace and was ready to kick some butt on the bike. But then my helmet decided to be an ass. I saw this happen to a guy at Rocketman and told myself to check my helmet strap before the race to make sure that it didn't happen to me. Well it did. I went to fasten the clip on my helmet strap and it came off in my hand. I spent 5 minutes in transition trying to get the clip back on so that it would stay fastened. Having an unfastened helmet is a DQ in the race so I had to get it fixed. I smoked Melissa on the first run but she caught up to me because I was sitting in transition playing with my helmet. I wasn't happy. Usually playing with my helmet makes me happy, but not in this case.

Steven was kicking ass at this point. He was leading the packe with a dominating first run. I was almost impressed.

Getting Ready

And we're off

Transition

Done with the run, ready to ride..but oh shit, my helmet

Melissa caught up with me because I f**king with my helmet

She is off.. kind of

Hitting the ride

Steven finishing

and after Steven finishes, I come back from the bike ride.

The bike ride was tough. They opened up the test area where they used to test all of the rockets for the space program. It was nice and scenic and all that jazz. But the roads sucked, you couldn't get into aero position and hold any speed. Melissa said that the bike leg was incredibly boring and that she was singing to herself, counting cars and people, and basically fiddle-farting around. It's a race damnit, there is no singing!

Steven finished awesome. He came in 4th overall and first in his age group. I managed to beat the station despite my helmet issues. Melissa finished, and well, that's all I can say about her singing ass.

First place Steven!

Melissa conquering her age group

Melissa heading to the finish

We did it....

The racers of awesomeness

Pushing to the finish

Gonna beat the station!

Done with the bike, now for the last run

Kicking ass and taking names

So I beat the station. Melissa didn't, but she finished ahead of the one other girl in her age group to capture first place! We all had a fun time! This was a fun race and I was glad that I participated.